Who the FUCK took this picture? THAT person should go to jail. If you see eyes like this and don’t go to the police, you’re culpable, seriously.
I’m sick of reading all these balanced political discussions of what we should do in the wake of the Newtown Massacre. After spending my time since Friday listening to my wife bawl and shaking my head at various screens, I don’t have any balanced thoughts; all I have are over the top reactions, and here they are:
10. I’m really glad Adam Lanza shot and killed his dumb cunt of a mother. This fucking gun-nut prepper whore taught her psychotic son to shoot automatic weapons.
“MOM CAN I HADDA GLOCK FOR CHRITMAD??”
“Sure, honey—how are your voices?”
Her death won’t bring anyone back but at least it’s something. I just couldn’t stand to hear her all tearful and “please respect our privacy during this tough time.”
9. This whole situation is worse than 9/11. When you fly a plane into buildings and don’t give a fuck what happens, you’re psychotic, but there’s a level of abstraction there. When you point guns into children’s faces and shoot them at point-blank range multiple times, you’re literally worse than Hitler and Satan. FUCK ME BLIND I wish I believed in hell.
8. Adam Lanza’s brother and father should be sentenced to a lifetime of guarding schools and investigating potential psychos. Unless they REPORTED this kid, it’s not enough that they’re tearful and sorry.
Deloitte and fucking Touche should have to monitor these guys’ progress at tracking down other psychos and saving lives, and if their performance goes below standard they get sent to Rikers.
7. All these parents are heroes for continuing to live and not killing themselves and abandoning their other children. They should be given 10 million dollars each, mandatorily invested in an ING plan so that they can just live off the interest forever and then at least they won’t have any further material worries. LEAST JESUS CAN DO.
6. Chris Rock’s bullets thing is true. I’m not going to link to it, if you haven’t seen it you should be embarrassed, not me.
5. People who want to buy guns must undergo yearly psychological evaluations and can own no more than TEN FUCKING BULLETS lifetime total. If you’re a normal citizen, there’s no reason to shoot at real people more than 10 times in your life. If you have to, you did it wrong; now you’re out of bullets.
4. For those who are concerned about these draconian bullet restrictions, e.g. “How am I supposed to go to the shooting range and practice,” the answer is simple: You can use the shooting range’s bullets!! You just can’t take them home. How do we enforce it?? I CAN’T GET ON A PLANE WITH A FUCKING TOOTHBRUSH AND YOU’RE ASKING ME HOW WE ENFORCE IT??
Mandatory metal detectors and they crawl up your ass and shoes when you leave a shooting range to make sure you’re not smuggling out bullets. That’s how we enforce it.
3. Patriot Act and email monitoring and shit has to include other groups besides Muslims. YOU HEAR ME FBI?? I know you focus on the Muslims, and I’m not arguing in terms of nukes and large-scale attacks, but this kind of attack is bad, too, and carried out by a whole different demographic which seems to be slipping through your nets. Please get on these fuckers too.
2. Teachers need a fucking raise.
1. The media should be immediately prohibited from ever releasing a name or picture of this type of assailant. THIS IS NOT OVER THE FUCKING TOP. These guys do this shit to get a high score and go on Wikipedia. We don’t negotiate with terrorists because it theoretically gives an incentive to other terrorists. So WHY do we treat these guys like James Joyce, crawl up their asses to read their fucking journals and trying to “understand” them? We treat them the same exact way we treat heroes, so why wouldn’t other little psychos want to belong to the same club?
KNOCK THAT SHIT OFF!
Oy gevalt, what a fucking world.