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Clement Weather
• 03.07.12 09:00 am

What remains of eighteen-year-old Taylor Sauer has been scrubbed from the asphalt of an Idaho Freeway.

According to reports, she was sending text and Facebook messages every 90 seconds while barreling 80MPH down the road.

The last message she ever pecked out in her life, “Driving and facebooking is not safe! Haha,” was made mere seconds before she smashed into a tanker truck and instantly died.

“I think she was probably (texting) to stay awake, she was probably tired,” her father told NBC’s Today. Ever hear of coffee?

Even though texting while driving is more dangerous than driving while drunk, people continue doing it. It killed over 16,000 people between 2001-2007. For comparison’s sake, less than 16,000 people were murdered in the USA in 2010.

In 2010, celebrity plastic surgeon Dr. Frank Ryan plunged off a cliff while Tweeting about his dog, disfiguring himself beyond recognition and dying in the process.

Although there’s a certain Darwinian justice in the deaths of those who are dumb enough to type out personal messages as they careen down a highway, the problem (as with drunk driving) is that the innocent also often get creamed in the process.

Texting while driving is now illegal in most states, but I don’t think it goes far enough. I support live, televised public executions of anyone caught texting while driving. You may call that callous, but what else do you suggest to stop it? Before opening your yaps, imagine losing a family member or your closest friend because some inconsiderate asshole couldn’t wait to change their “Relationship” status on Facebook. Sad as it is, some people need to be scared out of their fucking minds before they’ll change behaviors that are harmful to others.




  1. Ughhh.. says:

    fucked my day up.

  2. WEELLLLLLL, I definitely didn’t need to see that photo at the bottom. Thanks, Street Carnage!

  3. FBI Agent says:

    Yes, the true offense here is showing a picture of what people look like after texting and driving rather than the fact that about 3,000 people a year wind up looking like this after texting and driving.

  4. Hipstard says:

    4,000 blacks lynched in American history.

    16,000 people dead from texting from 2001-2007.

    Our sense of selective outrage is really really fucked up.

  5. nacirema says:

    ^^ yikes ^^

  6. Gordon Guano says:

    Finally, Street Carnage lives up to its name!

  7. pogi says:

    the person on the front passenger seat got decapitated

  8. pony says:

    Wait… what was that about selective outrage regarding LYNCHING? C-ccould you expand upon that?

    So… lynching was kind of… alright? yeah?

  9. Hipstard says:

    ^^^ Seriously, how logically deprived would you have to be to reach such a dumb conclusion? How could you reach the conclusion that what I’m saying is “lynching is OK” rather than “the relative silence about text-killing is wrong”? Exactly how low were your SATs?

    I realize it’s heretical to think that outrage should be somewhat proportional to how many actual humans, regardless of skin color, are harmed by something. There’s a common yet completely illogical belief that the REASON someone was killed is far more important than the FACT that they were killed. How about you go out tonight and find some surviving family members of people who got creamed into tomato paste by some careless idiot driving Tweeter and explain that their loved one’s death isn’t nearly as important as someone who was lynched 100 years ago?

    With extremely rare exceptions, lynching ended about fifty years ago, yet even its mention brings people like you out of the woodwork to act flabbergasted.

    We’re talking about something that’s killing thousands of people NOW and there’s not remotely the same sense that this is something really, really fucked up that is actively killing people.

    Bet you never knew that a quarter of America’s lynching victims were white. Again—selective outrage. Thanks for proving my point.

  10. bollocktothis says:

    it is indeed sas that the innocent have to die but as long as fucking texting arseholes die as well is the important thing
    and whichever way you look at it, the worlds a hideously overpopulated toilet of a place, so whatever does the job eh? lynching, gas chambers, gulags, transportation to the colonies, cigarettes, terrorist attacks, they’re all good.

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