Posted by
Gavin
• 08.05.14 09:57 am

Every time I say women’s ovaries have a shelf life, people look at me like I love rape. I’ve even heard doctors being called sexist for pointing out this basic, biological fact. 

You try and explain that you’ve seen all your 40-something female friends go insane trying to turn back the clock with fertility drugs etc. but young women keep insisting they’re part of the tiny percentage of females who don’t want kids. You say they are falling into a trap and the only people who benefit from women who kid themselves is men who don’t want to settle down (and these lazy assholes with no ambition or balls are also to blame). It all goes into the ether and you figure there are no young women on earth who understand biology. Then two sane girls pop on to your TV and you feel like there is hope. FINALLY.

“Oh what, you think biological reality doesn’t apply to you in your adorable cocoon of agelessness? 

Well it does. While you’re just waiting around focussing on you. Guess what.YOU’RE GOING TO MISS YOUR FUCKING WINDOW!”

New season starts this Thursday on IFC

-GAVIN McINNES

 


Comments
  1. Horsetits says:

    ChIcKs LiKe ThAt I DiG

  2. So talented. “Turn for the Douche” is a great song.

  3. innie boner says:

    sorry. but these girls are unfunny ugly trolls. have fun going out for vegan food with them. if you’re lucky you’ll get to read some of their poetry. they are DEF. sporting full bush.

  4. TurdTown says:

    innie boner, I’ve seen Hell Baby and I categorically disagree with you. Also, life has taught me that men who hate on lady pubes are at least a little bit self-loathingly gay.

  5. raymi says:

    too close to home bro! lol

  6. corey says:

    Their message may be on point but they are terribly unfunny. Musical comedy is the one thing that all white people should ashamed for.

  7. corey says:

    *of

  8. Terry Thomas says:

    I love a full bush.

  9. Ben says:

    “sorry. but these girls are unfunny ugly trolls. have fun going out for vegan food with them. if you’re lucky you’ll get to read some of their poetry. they are DEF. sporting full bush.”
    Nothing wrong with a nice bush you fag.

  10. Philip Seymourz Ghost says:

    Everyone on that show OTHER than these two is funny. Its like the writers stop at the girls themselves and give them the lamest bullshit imaginable. Its not the delivery. The material is just not funny. Get some better writers, ladies.

  11. ChiTownPlayaHata says:

    men who don’t want to settle down (and these lazy assholes with no ambition or balls are also to blame).

    Yeah…. we’ll see, G. We’ll see how it’s going in five years. Or ten. Things might be awesome. Or you might be gutted by the ruthlessness of a woman you don’t even know, sitting across from you in divorce court, flanked by the kids who won’t even talk to you because she’s poisoned them.

    There’s more to it than laziness or lack of balls.

  12. ??? says:

    Chi – Yeah, I mean why get out of bed? You might get hit by a car. Why do anything worthwhile in life? You might fail or accomplish only part of your goal.

  13. […] Jim Goad, Naomi Schaefer Riley, Katie Pavlich, Charles Krauthammer, Kevin D. Williamson, and Garfunkel and Oates. These people don’t lie to win an argument. They speak uncomfortable truths because that’s the […]


Leave A Reply