Posted by
• 12.26.12 09:30 pm

OK, so I ‘ve made a decent income for the past 10 years.

Funny, since the economy is supposed to be in the shithouse, right? I think the main reason I’ve been making money all these years is because I FUCKING WORKED FOR IT.

That’s the difference between hobos and regular people. To clarify, I’m speaking of the working v. begging part. I smell just as terrible as any homeless bum.

Since 2009, Kickstarter has reintroduced the art of public begging with their "crowd funding." The site boasts a 43.85% total success rate, which has helped fund projects such as Tentacle Bento, "a tentacle card game intended to satirize Japanese schoolgirl tentacle rape comics."

The amazing thing is that bona-fide celebrated individuals such as Colin Hanks, Matthew Modine, and megastar Ricki Lake have used Kickstarter for their projects. Even Whoopi Goldberg, deep-pocketed as she is, used the site for what was undoubtedly some marvelous piece of shit. At least she didn’t have to pay for it.

My grandfather used to tell me, "There’s only one place money comes from: work." If he were alive today, I’d wave an iPad in his face and say, "Not true, gramps! You can beg people for money on the information superhighway. It’s called Kickstarter!"





  1. anne-onymous says:

    How can you claim to have a job, yet not understand the difference between running a kickstarter campaign to develop a product and begging on the street?

  2. GI says:

    Here’s a scenario. Small-scale games developer needs £300 to hire a composer to make music for his game. The bank manager laughs in his face. As a result he goes on kickstarter, asks for the money, the money is given, and he completes his game. Everyone who helped gets a copy of the end product.

    Begging: Giving money with no return
    Kickstarter: Giving money in return for products, games, merchandise etc.

    How is it that you fail to see the fundamental difference?

    How is this ANY different to pre-ordering a title from say, Bethesda or Rockstar ?

  3. cpJ says:

    semantics…it’s begging

  4. Lester says:

    no coercion involved = finey doo

  5. anne-onymous says:

    @cpJ & kennedy… by your reckoning, every company that is listed on the stock exchange is begging, as is every developer that pre-sales blocks or apartments, and every aerospace manufacturer that takes orders for aeroplanes.

    I find it strange that you can not see the difference, so I will lay it out. A begger asks for money for the sake of personal need and gives nothing in return. A kickstarter campaign, or the other entities I mentioned ask for a payment upfront (often at a discount) for a product that will be created in the future. Thus is is not begging, it is ‘selling’.

  6. Kennedy Kickstart My Socks says:

    Merry Christmas, Kennedy. Welcome to the future. It is a Kickstarter world.

    In this world are independent, motivated individuals generating products, asking for support from those who believe in them, and, finally, being held accountable for their work. Sounds like a good business model to me. I have experienced Kickstarter, and learned quite a lot from participating. Funny, the most flack I got for participating in Kickstarter, at least the most flack that I got directed toward me, was from people who wished they had my moxie – even though my project failied to raise the money I had projected. I am not afraid to admit this. In fact, it was through Kickstarter, that I learned about how to better anticipate people’s willingness to give. Guess I could have enrolled in MBA-school, but, hey, why not try living life to the fullest by engaging with positive, creative, crowd-sourcing? This is what America is all about! If you are not into Kickstarter, that is fine. Stick to conventional modes of economic sustainability like ____________________ (fill in the blank).

    Another good thing about Kickstarter is that it teaches those who wish to learn more about entrereneuership, the art of the pitch, and how to set realistic goals. What more could you want? Oh, I know, you want a docile labor pool of workers who are afraid to pitch innovative ideas, or even to work independently. Or, you want workers who are simply dependent on “the man” for a paycheck. Or you want everybody to simply take their script to Hollywood. Arrange a meeting with an agent, and pitch their hit show and have it magically produced despite the fact that they may lack familial connections. OK. Got it. Grandpa was obviously right.

    Sure, there are exceptions. But why dump on Kickstarter?

    For example, wouldn’t it be the case that Grandpa might like Kickstarter, too?

    I would like to suggest that Grandpa propbably also believed in the dignity of labor. If so, then, undoubtedly, grandpa would have loved Kickstarter.

    Some of the hardest working, most creative individuals, individuals who are innovative, and community-minded, use Kickstarter to plant a seed.

    Good on them. Hey, when I say Kickstarter is the future, I mean, Kickstarter representatives even visited my university to give a presentation to Masters students. Is this indoctrination? Dunno. But more people were exposed to the magic of Kickstarter, for sure.

    This brings up another point, and perhaps some of your readers may be able to relate to this. What do you call the kids whose parent(s), or grandparent(s) pumped money into their offspring’s small business?

    @Kennedy, would such “independently financied” progeny be considered welfare recipients who were launched by simply sucking on the parental tit – or peen?

    What kind of priviliged begging is this? Should not they have just worked and saved their own $$ before accepting a handout from the parental units? I wonder, what G-pa would say?

    This shit is brills. Umm, who wants to hire Socks for real work?

  7. Anonymous says:

    I get that you’re baiting us and all, so ha ha you win, but just incase anyone was convinced (confused?) by this article…

    Crowd-source funding where backers get something in return is akin to angel investors giving money to a tech startup in exchange for a percentage of the company, which is common practice for lots of new tech companies. Of course, this is akin to getting a loan from the bank in exchange for payments + interest, which is also common practice for lots of other businesses.

    I assume you made your money “working hard” at someone else’s business, so you aren’t expected to know anything about the backend of things. Unless, of course, you intend to write a shitty article complaining about a successful, self-made business that helps launch other successful, self-made businesses.

  8. Chapter After says:

    For sure there’s an ROI for begging. It’s called: I’m-a-lot-less-likely-to-rob-you-at-gunpoint.

    And true, this is also semantics.

  9. Kennedy says:

    When you get a good or service for “support”(money), this is called “selling” – even if it takes place on Kickstarter. When I go to work, I’m not asking anyone for their “support.” I’m asking for money for my service. Work = money. It’s tough to say who is getting the better end of the deal when I get paid for work, because my policy is to “do more than I’m getting paid for” because every year that goes by I am “paid more for what I do.”

    There are plenty of projects on Kickstarter that offer a “special thanks” or “facebook shoutout” for a contribution. This is not selling. It is asking for money(support).

    Companies on the stock market have investors. Investing(owning part of the company or reaping long or short term gains from the success of the project) is prohibited on Kickstarter.

    I’ve worked hard for other people and I’ve worked hard for myself getting my own projects off the ground. Everything costs money. If I’m working on a passion project, like making a movie or writing a book(both of which I’ve done), I fund it with money I make from working, not money I ask other people to give me in exchange for a shoutout, a copy of the movie, or dinner with the director.

    Adults with jobs make movies, music albums, documentaries, or books in their spare time. It’s the passion that allows us to work harder and do more in life(because we want more in life).

  10. Selling Labor says:

    Work = Labor = Paycheck. Passion is based on desire. It may or may not have any relation to work. It would be great to see more posts that cover the ways in which the creative class are innovating society, regardless of their use of pre-existing structures be they Kickstarter or the conventional labor force.

  11. zbow says:

    The problem with kickstarter, and people in general, is that there are too many individuals who believe they are possessed of infinitely more talent than is the case. This likely results from the “everybody wins” ideology that’s been pushed down their throats sine childhood. So, they naturally believe that their “projects” deserve your contributions, even though in (nearly) every case the term “project” is synonymous with “hobby.”

    Bottom line: except in rare cases, your band is average, your ideas are pedestrian, and your work ethic is embarrassing.

  12. Lester says:

    To me Kickstarter means one thing and one thing only: Kickstart my Heart by Motley Crue

  13. Sam says:

    “Kickstarter is bullshit”, I thought i was the only one who thought this haha. Thank you

  14. Sam says:

    “Kickstarter is bullshit”, I thought I was the only one who thought this haha. Thank you.

    @GI, donating to something on kickstarter doesn’t always mean you’ll get something out of it, it’s usually only the top contributors. I’ve also seen instances where the top contributors didn’t get what they were promised.

  15. waitwhat says:

    This coulda been a tweet. I guess that hard workin’ drive of yours pushed you into extending it into a full on post.

  16. What’s confusing is I thought you were

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