Posted by
Denise
• 06.30.08 01:30 pm

Tell me again why we’re supposed to follow gay men’s lead when it comes to fashion advice?

Tell me again why we’re supposed to follow gay men’s lead when it comes to fashion advice?

I’m kinda bitter about the fashion industry, because it’s obvious that alotta the expensive stuff that’s for sale for women is based on a body type—carpenter’s dream—that’s only attractive to gay men who are into twinks. But, everyone knows that already, right? Like, I’ve always been amazed at the success that a lot of gay men find in fashion because sometimes they just make women look downright hideous. And how much longer can this go on? You’d think that, evolutionarily speaking, women who can afford to achieve the looks you see on a lot of runways or in magazines would never be able to have children because straight dudes wouldn’t want to fuck them. For example, even if you could find a warm, moist orifice here, would you even wanna stick your dick in it?

I kinda want those shoes though.

I used to think it was some kind of like conspiracy on the part of fashion fags. Like, that they kinda wish they were women, and because they aren’t, they want to sorta punish us. But then I was looking over this photo gallery for beachwear for men, and I realized that maybe that’s not the case. They don’t even know how to dress themselves. Maybe it has to do with some like subconscious self-hatred for being gay in the first place. Or maybe if you take it in the ass enough you just start to have shit for brains. I know I feel like that on mornings after I operate with three inputs.


Comments
  1. Red says:

    sorry girl but clothes just hang better on skinny people. Gays arent saying you can’t wear this if you’re fat. They’re just saying, here’s the best way to see my clothes. if it makes you feel better chubby people look better in the nude than skinnies.

  2. whatevs says:

    check out the mosquito bites on that one chick!

  3. Applejacks says:

    “sorry girl but clothes just hang better on skinny people.”

    Well Red, seeing as though they are designers, they should probably just put their skills to the test and design and tailor their clothing so it hangs properly on people with tits and asses.

  4. Ben B says:

    I dun git fashun either! HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRR!

  5. timb says:

    you don’t have a convincing case with these examples.

    swimsuits for men are always the same: some trunks that separate legs from torso. this one breaks up the body shape in an interesting way, while still being flattering. also, the vertical line and arrowhead shape over the genitals draws your eyes downward from his face. in effect the swimsuit tries to make you check out his whole body. it’s good design.

    also, come on. you’re picking the worst clown outfit you can find for a girl. gays can also dress up girls in extremely sexy ways, although that is often not the point of runway fashion. often they just want to make some weirdo clothes to push boundaries; to try for something no one else has ever made. if no one did these extreme explorations of style, we’d evolve more slowly because for all the ugly ideas that die off outside of experimental fashion, the good ones filter down into everyday use.

    in any case, looking at this stuff keeps us entertained.

  6. Burrito says:

    They are scared of tits.

  7. nibbington pip says:

    i would cry if i got told to go out out on a runway wearing those trunks and shoes.

  8. sacha says:

    I know gay people that actually fit perfectly to your descrption : jealous girl haters. But when i read your shit, it looks like you’re an up tight never fucked housewife with severed overweight and severed limbs due to diabete. Oh yeah the word is : bitter. A bit like those hating fags! But hey I can understand. It’s just… you know, you sound like a men stole your guy… not arousing.

  9. murderface says:

    “Maybe it has to do with some like subconscious self-hatred for being gay in the first place. Or maybe if you take it in the ass enough you just start to have shit for brains.”

    this is 2008, bitch. fuck off with that

  10. queers says:

    you had me until this post, Denise. This, however, is no good. I’ll take gay designer fashion over your unoriginal and dated griping any day

  11. vyvanse says:

    i’m gay as a unicorn baking quiche and i can tell you for a fact that denise is right on the money! we really do yearn to be chicks. so much that we are mad at them that we’re not.

    yep, we’re so jealous that you’re expected to waste tons of time and money on grooming and beauty and weird creepy hygiene garbage. we wish we could not have penises and only be able to have sex one way. most of all, we’re pissed that y’all get to have a stale-smelling toothless mouth in your crotch that barfs up bloody woulda-been babies every month. i want that too, bitch!

  12. chuchu says:

    Fashion is good for you!


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