As a brother, a husband, and a son, I must admit that I am exactly as outraged as many of my fellow Americans are in light of Trump’s recent comments. I’m not even referring to the infamous recording from 2005, when he was caught in a private conversation bragging about his sexual advances, which I found to be equally deplorable. I’m talking instead about the following sentence, which he twice repeated last week during the debate:
“I will look at it at the time.”
Bombshell, I know. He was of course answering a question about whether he will accept the voting results and concede to Hillary after the election, should he lose. How dare this maniac question the integrity of our elections, which are heralded as the cornerstone of our democracy. Any evidence of tempering or fraud should be dismissed a priori.
It’s not really edgy to post mainstream CNN or NBC articles to let your friends see how outraged you are, so you get more style points by referencing a more fashionable source, if even in a literal sense.
Sports talking head Keith Olbermann, who now corresponds for GQ on all needs special, also shares my level of outrage, screaming that Trump’s comments implying a lack of reverence for pure and uncorrupted election outcomes were the “moral equivalent of treason.” Twice yelling that Trump should “BURN IN HELL!” Olbermann then listed three specific claims about the treasonous comments to “look at it at the time,” calling them:
Of all the media outlets berating dimwit American yokels for supporting Trump, it’s a bit odd that Gentlemen’s Quarterly is such a loud voice. Although it’s not surprising that the political commentary churned out by a periodical that generally focuses on manscaping isn’t exactly think tank caliber.
GQ writer Drew Magary is also outraged by Dumb America’s support for Trump, calling “blue collar” voters morons, shitbirds, and hayseeds. Having moved on from gossiping in Gawker’s sports page about how much of a bee-otch, and a cock, and a pussy Brett Favre is—his words are now sandwiched between the pages of oiled-up rent boys modeling peep-toe mandals, and the scratch-n-sniff perfume samples of a fashion magazine. You’d think he’d have a bit more trepidation about lambasting “three-dollar diner” America when using such a pretentious platform to lecture us about being anti-establishment.
In his article called “If You’re a Republican, You Have No Right to Bitch about America,” he strangely claims that we already live in the small government utopia that Trump supporters claim to advocate. Look, if you’re stuck in the same conversations about gender inequality, gun control, and social services like you’re in a college dorm room, and still haven’t woken up to the adult reality that being left alone by the government and being taxed less is ultimately what any sane person would want, and if you still vote Democrat because you think it makes you more compassionate, I’m not really interested in your thoughts on a political party that at least pretends to run on a platform of individual liberty. If you’re not a Republican, you have no right to bitch about Republicans.
GQ is a magazine I actually used to enjoy—one of the best issues I can remember was from way back in July 2005, which featured smoking hot Jessica Simpson wearing an American flag bikini and fatigues on the cover. “Jessica Simpson, and 75 Other Reasons to Love America.” Back when people weren’t confounded by airhead blondes who loved their country—it celebrated Simpson as a “Bible belt-raised, teen-pop-honed, reality TV child bride.” It was cute that she couldn’t even pronounce Massachusetts. American flags, topless chicks, guns, hamburgers, gloating over your imprisoned enemies—only a decade ago, before any of us had heard the term “social justice,” 2005 was still a time when people embraced unapologetic Americana, even in a liberal rag like GQ.
Fast forward to the GQ of today and you’ll find former Anthony Weiner intern Olivia Nuzzi covering the campaign, smugly profiling another big-haired blonde with the “appearance of a country singer,” Trump supporter Scottie Nell Hughes. The article tries to make “head scratching” sense of a woman who, in response to the Pussygate scandal, admitted that she “wasn’t really bothered by the incident.”
Want to know who else wasn’t really bothered by the incident? Every honest person in America.
The article concludes with the reactions Hughes gets in response to her pro-Trump television appearances—being called a “stupid whore” and receiving threatening calls from irate strangers. Incidents of third-rail anti-feminist misconduct that Nuzzi seems to brush off as mere examples of “Trump-induced anxiety.” Right, attacks on Trump supporters are Trump’s fault.
These media outlets are full of hacks who look themselves in the mirror everyday and are frustrated by the fact that they are exactly as outraged and disgusted by these Trump comments as I am. Which is to say, they are not outraged at all. Comparing comments made by a political candidate to the Cuban Missile Crisis, 9/11, and the Civil Fucking War is insane. Fretting that Americans support Trump only because they are too stupid to know any better is as lazy as it gets. Hyperventilating drivel, name-calling, and misguided smugness are symptoms of your own self-doubt.
Making America great again is a tall order—but dialing it back to 2005 is a step in the right direction. Before it became fashionable to feign outrage and to embrace victimhood status after every insensitive comment uttered by a celebrity. Someone needs to tell GQ that political correctness and phony outrage over social injustices are out of vogue—that shit is soooo 2012.