Posted by
Benjamin Leo
• 05.06.11 04:20 pm

Three videos: only one real orgasm. Are you man enough to tell which is which?

Please have a seat.

It’s okay, she’s over 18 — but have a seat.

I look at these fucking Street Carnage access logs every week and I shake my head. You guys are clicking on tits and ass at a ratio of 5-to-1 over legitimately funny or provocative articles.

What is this audience turning into? You act uppity and intellectually elitist, but you’re every bit as predictable as NASCAR America. Really, Street Carnage? You have porn on the rest of the fucking internet — don’t you want to come here to read, laugh, think and discuss shit?

RIGHT below this article was one about Bin Laden’s death and why our American Hipster Youth are reacting as if it’s Creed doing a “Stairway to Heaven” cover. Fucking read it, assholes — engage, or you’re voting for this site to turn into a fucking eBaum’s shitwhole.

I’m going to look at the fucking stats at the end of this week, and there better be MORE hits for “HIPSTERS: TOO COOL TO CELEBRATE OUR VICTORY” than for this Chris Hanson trap.

Decision time:

If you wanna bail out and be a pussy, go jerk off here.

If you wanna support this fucking community, go read this and comment.

As you were.

Follow The Ben Word on Twitter.

  1. nick manning says:

    eat my ass leo. i come here for both.

  2. HighChair SpoonBanger says:

    WTF, so now this site has completely devolved into a forum for stay-at-home failed-writer dads (who regularly post barely legal “art” shots) to hector horndogs who come to see said barely-legal posts? This makes as much sense as an “Ask Barf” seminar on the piggishness of men who don’t dig fat chicks.

    I guess without Bin Has-BeenLah to kick around, there’s some sort of existential neocon false-ironic crypto-jew sand-nigga flailing-about identity crisis going down along with declining readership, eh? Who’s sinking Ben’s battleship, the whiners, or the whinees? And why do chinese immigrants now own all the midtown hole-in-the-wall taco shops? Get with it! I hate you all you aging hipsters that are my rantful identity sounding board! You all need a real job, your wives provide the health insurance!

  3. clif says:

    I’m a 25 year old male, my body is hosting a 24/7 hormone rave and everyone is underage and on e! of course I’m looking at tittys.

    If you want me to broaden my perspective I’ll just take my daily street boner time and shift it over into the huffington post time slot.

  4. Julius T. Leisure says:

    Now you’re Obama Ben Leo.

  5. HOOOOOOOOLY SHIT. Grow up man.

    Thanks for the link, best thing you posted all day.

  6. buffalowinger says:

    already read it, now it’s time to jerk off to big girls

  7. joe says:

    People didn’t read or comment on the OBL article because it was bullshit.

  8. yannis says:

    RC @joe Says:
    People didn’t read or comment on the OBL article because it was supid

    05.06.11 at 6:28 pm

  9. i clicked says:

    i got a bit of a tit.
    and a bit of an ass.

  10. Ames says:

    So, where’s the porn?

  11. Uncle Wah Wah says:

    Personally, I enjoy the pictures of homeless people lying in shit. I guess I have always been middle of the road moderate.

  12. Charles Krauthamburgler says:

    If Benny-boy is so intent upon being taken seriously as a purveyor of Serious Opinion, he should go over and write for Takimag! Oh! HaHA! O! MAH FALLOWING! OH!! HAHAHAHAAHAHA HAHAHAAAAA HAHAHhahahahaah ahahAAZAzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  13. Anonymous says:

    don’t tell me what to read or think

  14. luvedovee says:

    Guilt won’t make me go back to that horribly written post! This whole “why can’t we play with his corpse in the street?” crap just leads to more misery similar to what you experienced. It’s called taking the high road. Not being like the ones who wronged you! I mean that in least religious or moral way possible.

  15. Y'all niggaz says:

    Postin in a troll thread!!!

  16. Poopy McSmeary says:

    ^^ yeah it’s obviously a troll thread but it’s hella hormone fun throwing dirt clods at the other kid’s fort, innit? See how they make a puff and a thud! whoohooo!

  17. oreanish says:

    Eeeeasy. You just had to ask.

    PS Your trap worked perfectly.

  18. every1uNo says:

    it’s like getting rick rolled except it’s w a y more pretentious and doesn’t have a funky beat i can really groove too

  19. Boner says:

    I’m sorry, I thought this was a site about boners.

  20. Charles says:

    Um, here’s the problem: Your post about Bin Laden was beyond stupid, and the chest-beating 90’s era contrarian right wing posturing is boring and out of date at this point.

    In sum: Everything on this site that is not about clothes and attractive people is irrelevant.

  21. Sergian says:

    Fuck. I was really, really looking forward to the orgasm test.

  22. WaxWingSlain says:

    tits or get the fuck out, fagot

  23. Frank DeFalco says:

    You got me with Casey Chase. Never really been into Sasha Grey’s acting.

  24. articles shmarticles says:

    All of the articles on these sites are overwrought self righteous indignant piles of garbage. No real analysis or thought is ever put into them and are more about masturbatory intellect flexing than really illuminating something. Go fuck yourself.

  25. PUNX 4 OBAMA says:

    I fake it all the time. I’m 18 and crush you all.

  26. chester says:

    i think the one on the right is faking

  27. buttfuck abubaca says:

    is benjamin leo the korean marine or is that the other guy?

  28. pfft says:

    you aren’t my real dad

  29. Okay says: you made me read that whole article and all I got out of it was “waaah I lost 10 followers on twitter because of my I’m-a-muhfuckin-MURRICAN tweet”.

    Bring on the titties you bastard.

  30. Cronan says:

    Let’s all just go on over to and get serious about things. Maybe they’ll hire Leo, since he is all for fostering community and getting great messages out there. Not to mention his immense talent.

  31. Anonymous says:

    Hysterical. Ben Leo is so right.

  32. Zippy says:

    Talk politics asshole. I’ll go with line 2 column 1. FWAP!!!!

  33. Blogcracker says:

    Damn you. I was all juiced to test my fake orgasm detection skills, which I would put to use fucking all kinds of twenty-something women to celebrate the killing of Osama bin Laden.

  34. Charles says:

    If the owners and writers of this site are distressed about its declining readership, they should consider that their poorly written, poorly reasoned extreme right wing articles are alienating most of the site’s visitors.

    As I said above, it’s boring and out of step with the times.

  35. Dickhead420 says:

    Just read the other page. You made me want to stop looking at titties to listen to you whine about how you wish some dumb kids were more like you? never again.

  36. Nice! says:

    “‘HIPSTERS: TOO COOL TO CELEBRATE OUR VICTORY’ then for this Chris Hanson trap.” It’s THAN. Not THEN.

  37. esteban says:

    ben, you’re the most boring guy on this site, that’s maybe why people don’t read your posts as much. stop having body issues over it.

  38. unclaimed smegma says:

    If you’d prefer people to read “serious opinion”, stop posting porn. It’s easy. If you want to be taken seriously, check who you associate with.

  39. boobies says:

    I’m nothing more than an animal.

  40. leo, you fucking goof says:

    lame! if you think that street boners and tv carnage was made famous by you and your thoughts on 9-11 then maybe you haven’t seen any of the “12 neat photos” series of blog posts that show hot tits on tight chicks. don’t kid yourself leo. nytimes this ain’t! i’ll say this much though, if the nytimes started showing a little skin, i’d probably care more about whatever the fuck it is they talk about. no one cares about hipsters talking about hipsters anymore! that ship has sailed friend! get some new material.

  41. Smelly says:

    ^ Took the jerk off here option.

  42. Miss universe says:

    my boyfriend downloaded a computer virus onto my laptop with this link, thanks a lot bleo. not cool.

  43. Jesus Cries says:

    hahahaha miss universe ^^^^

    yeah, he got it from that link, not from clicking that link and the billions of links it lead to and jerking off for an hour.

    next thing he’ll tell you: he got that herpes from a toilet seat

  44. poo says:

    I go to other places than this for intelligent, thought provoking articles. I come here for porn. I like porn.

  45. Leo says:

    I’m gay

  46. gzus h. casas says:

    man, are you gonna fucking show me some 18 year old bitches or fucking not?

  47. Kanky whore says:

    gzus h. casas is really right!

  48. Fuckabitch says:

    *cyber kick to the dome* I wanna fap to bitches, not get lectured by them

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