Posted by
Lasse Holmberg Josephsen
• 05.10.12 11:00 am


Genesis P-Orridge: Making a statement against gender distinctions or, perchance, in favor of creepiness.

In the June issue of Rolling Stone, Tom Gabel, singer and guitarist in American pop-punk band Against Me!, announced that he’s going to become a woman.

He’s going all the way—electrolysis, hormones, and surgery—and is changing his name to Laura Jane Grace. He’ll still be with his wife and two-year-old daughter, except he will now pee sitting down and hopefully sport a spectacular pair of tits.

So now he and his doomed penis is talked about in the news. Whoop-de-doo.

Gabel is by no means the first musician to become tired of his own genitals. He’s walking on a well-trodden path littered with severed peni and unwelcome chest hair. Let’s take a look at some of his predecessors.

The 16th century Italian castrato singers were men who’d been castrated before they hit puberty, thus preserving their angelic prepubescent voices, like a bunch of King Diamonds with no balls. But the castrati can hardly be called transsexual or transgendered, so let’s move forward to the 50s.

George William Jorgensen, Jr. was the first widely known person to have sex reassignment surgery. On a trip to Denmark, the former Army man let a guy by the almost implausibly perfect name of Dr. Hamburger begin hormone-replacement therapy on him, then later surgery. Jorgensen arrived back in New York in 1953 as a celebrity. Now called Christine Jorgensen, she became a nightclub entertainer and recorded several songs, but the song most people remember her for was one she didn’t even sing on. The song "Is She Is or Is She Ain’t” was a cheery calypso tune about Jorgensen and her spank new vagina. It was sung by a man we today know as Louis Farrakhan.

Limey Genesis P-Orridge used to scare the living shit out of people in the 70s when he was the uniform-clad frontman of legendary industrial group Throbbing Gristle and later Psychic TV. Then sometime in the 90s, he and his wife Lady Jaye decided that they were going to have surgery done to look like each other. They were well on their way when Jaye suddenly died from heart failure. P-Orridge was heartbroken but decided to keep altering his body with surgery. Today he still scares the living shit out of people, but for slightly different reasons.

A man named Yaron Cohen from Israel decided in 1993 to finish what his mohel started and had the doctors snip off his penis. He then achieved success as Dana International, almost winning the Eurovision Song Contest with "Layla Tov, Eropa,” an unholy piece of Hebrew disco music which comes damn close to put the Holocaust in a more positive light.

Chastity Bono, daughter of Sonny Bono and Cher, charmed everyone when she frequently appeared onstage in her parents’ TV show. When she turned 18, she came out as a lesbian and became the singer of the extremely forgettable band Ceremony. In 2008, Chastity decided to make her dead Republican father spin even more rapidly in his grave as she became Chaz Salvatore Bono, a big burly creature of a man. Unfortunately for Chaz, he ended up looking like a giant testicle.

Bay Area rapper Katastrophe is a transgendered performer in the notoriously macho and bigoted hip-hop community, something which ironically makes me think he has balls.

These, and several others, are members of the merry gender-bending brother/sisterhood Gabel will be joining. It’s definitely a weird bunch, filled with asymmetric silicone breasts and revealing Adam’s apples as it is, but at least it’s interesting to look at, which is more than you can say about Against Me! right now. Don’t tell me that picture wouldn’t be improved by a pair of weird tits.

—LASSE HOLMBERG JOSEPHSEN

 


Against Me!: Should be called “Against My Genitals!”


Comments
  1. Nate says:

    Will they suddenly be “Against The Cis-Privileged” as well?

  2. the man says:

    bad move Tom Gabel. at least now you get a little dong. it might be your own but hey

  3. d-bo says:

    hipster homophobia. even though this has nothing to do with homos. i often cry myself to sleep at night.

  4. Lasse says:

    Where’s the homophobia here?

  5. Here says:

    Good for Tom for being himself.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Since when did “being yourself” mean “radically mutilating your own body”?

    Further evidence PC has its head WAYYYYYYYYYYYYY up its own ass.

    PC is the Emperor’s New Buttplug.

  7. Puss says:

    The first deliberate caveman body piercing?

  8. just a cunt hair away says:

    can you be anything near punk with a burberry shirt? get real.

  9. angelo says:

    If I were him, I would have just a wear a wig and a woman’s dress just in case I change my mind again

  10. angelo says:

    *would have just worn a wig…*

  11. ultimate truth bringer 2000 says:

    first we had fags, now this weird tranny shit. what’s next, paedo-rock?

  12. It's about the music says:

    Never mind the gender switch, will the band STILL suck? My guess is YES!!!!

  13. All of the X-Men says:

    The 2000s have become nothing but self-indulgent. Everyone has a right to be whoever they want and society will fight for that right.
    This is an example of someone who has realised that and has enough money to make a difference (to himself).
    But with all the self-indulgent wank everywhere nowadays, how is this a topic of discussion?
    There are people killing themselves everyday because of depression and anxiety…but they can’t afford the most expensive psychiatric help and the best drugs, unlike this duder.
    But who gives a shit?
    This guy has the means to change his gender!
    Will it make him happier? Probs not.
    Let’s just see how this works out…and laugh the whole way through, or in, or inside-out, or however they do that.

    Also, please refrain from derogatory terms toward whatever we call gender-reassigned people because it’s a touchy topic that I judge people harshly for degrading.

  14. Lasse Holmberg Josephsen says:

    “Also, please refrain from derogatory terms toward whatever we call gender-reassigned people because it’s a touchy topic that I judge people harshly for degrading.”

    Oh, okay. Hear that, folks? From now on we have to write in a way that makes “All of the X-Men” happy. He’s obviously our new editor.

  15. Mr. Happy Pants says:

    It begs the question why did Chastity Bono try to look like Chris Christie?

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