Posted by
• 12.08.09 10:00 am

Amanda Blank is a rapstress from Philadelphia with whom you may already be familiar. She raps with the mouth of a pirate hooker and she’s a class act in person.

Amanda Blank is a rapstress from Philadelphia with whom you may already be familiar. She raps with the mouth of a pirate hooker and she’s a class act in person. Amanda is hot, but not so hot that you’d be afraid to kick it to her at last call. Hearing her rap about all of the ways she’s going to let you hit it is empowering; it gives you confidence knowing that some girls are really WAY MORE into the weird shit than some men. So with this in mind, I took her to San Francisco’s Good Vibrations, a dildo shop.

Advanced Clit Pump

STREET CARNAGE: Do you like this one?

AMANDA BLANK: Oh yeah, I do. [Tries it on her nose.] That’s aweseome! That feels crazy. Oh my god. It’s kind of like a blowjob, you know, for ladies. And it vibrates! Oh my god, I really need to buy something for my boo. I’ve seen ones that are huge, I’m sure they have them here….

Randy Purple Silicone Dildo

This one’s big. I would not want to have sex with this.

Why not?

It’s just entirely too big. No girls needs this much. What, am I giving birth? I think this would make me cry. This is bigger than 2 inches in diameter! That’s too much. And it just doesn’t look good. It’s not pretty enough. Oh look, anal beads and shit.

Doggy Style Strap


I don’t understand this. Oh, it’s a strap!

I feel like that would be a lot of work for the dude because you’re, like, holding up the girl while you’re doing it.

It’s not a problem for that dude because he’s totally ripped.

Well the guys I date aren’t that ripped. No, I like fat boys.

Sliquid Sassy Booty Formula Lube

I’m a girl. I like lube, I’m not going to lie. I like this Sassy one! Apparently Please is best for anal.

How appropriate: “Please?”

Mia Rechargeable Vibrator

Oh my god. I want this one. It’s really discreet, and it’s USB powered. This is so rad! How do you stop it?

Feeldoe Silicone Dildo

This is the one! Just because I like the way it looks. It looks like a Camaro, it’s so hot! This is the one Peg Bundy would use.


  1. imyar says:

    liquid silk lube, the end.

  2. Kennedy says:

    I would like to give her a massage. A clit massage. With my mouth.

  3. Robert Louis Stevenson says:

    Did you know circumcised penis’ forces the glans to harden as the sensitive skin is always rubbing against denim or cotton. Taking that into account, add the fact that the removed foreskin is meant to move with a mans thrusting motion, you’ve got a recipe for unwarranted lube!

    That’s right! Circumcised penis’ are notorious for being abrasive and and deteriorating the vaginal wall (which is already doing this naturally with age), and so the phenomenon of lube comes into effect as sex becomes more and more painful for a woman with a circumcised partner.

    So thanks mom & dad, for giving me a boner that will ruin my future wifes cunt.

    The more you know, right!?

  4. the nacho chip says:

    bring aft the rum, darby!

  5. Mike E says:

    Hey, its Clayton.

  6. Don’t wave that orange thing around unless we get to watch you use it.

  7. ew says:

    people like u guys r the fucking worst. i worked at a dildo shop, and the worst aspect wasn’t the creepers or the whores, it was the smut tourists who would run around giggling and wouldn’t leave so i couldn’t take my smoke break. u fuckin suck!!

  8. Bitch Made says:

    Vids or it didn’t happen

  9. Professor Mudbutt says:

    shes not that hot.

  10. grandpa's yogurt says:

    hahaha! you workrd at a dildo shop.

  11. ew says:

    ^ i like the term workrd. its like marxism for the myspace generation. quick, somebody make that into a ny times piece.

  12. How many Times have i done this?? says:

    I have taken so many girls to that Sex Shop in the Mission. Just ask K about that french/vietnamese girl. LOL!!!!!!!!!! so are you into this or that? or everything?

  13. UnCLEDADDY says:

    Girls’ boners are so tiny and discreet, it’s not fair, we pitch huge tents and old ladies get scared on the B68 to Brighton Beach

  14. fredMS says:

    comments on prior posts about this chick said her music was good but the shit sucks. she’s a good rapper in the same vein as gucci being a good rapper (not very), but she’s not even as witty. i kno someone might say ‘who cares she’s hot’ but fuck that shit there are more important things.

  15. […] Better or Gimme What You Got, Amanda Blank is worth checking out.  This past week she went for a sex toy run at our Good Vibrations store on Polk St.Like many people’s first time in a sex toy store, […]

  16. Kool Karlo says:

    I didn’t read anything you wrote Clayton I’m still mad that I didn’t get to show up to Good Vibrations during the interview and fan out. You’re lucky I was in Seattle DJ’n. Oh BTW, FredMS get off the internet the 56k balling up your moms phone line.

  17. streetbummers says:

    Who doesn’t want a woman who wants what Peg Bundy wants? Perfecto.

  18. LOL says:

    Oh great another ‘sexually empowered” woman.

    how groudbreaking


  19. she is hot says:

    and pull that shiny hair the whole time

  20. she is hot says:

    I meant to say i’d fuck her AND pull that shiny hair the whole time. I love skinny crazy white bitches.

  21. Yes,Sir Arafat says:

    Jews gravitate to porn like ants to sugar.

  22. Awesome! says:

    This girl is a floosy.

  23. […] ?? Speaking of sex toys, Street Carnage with shopping for some with Amanda […]

  24. Sextoyrates says:

    Next time Amanda Blank is going sex toy shopping I hear she is going to hit up because she can compare prices on all the toys there, and save a bunch of money.

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