Posted by
Lorin
• 01.17.13 07:00 am



I’ve had some time to think about it, and I don’t think this “Shawty Lo” character deserves high marks in the field of responsible parenting.

Moreover, after considering personal character and deliberate association with Shawty Lo, I lack faith in the womb prudence of his kennel of baby mamas. I think Shawty Lo, talented as he may be, is both a scapegrace and a crumb who treats his jizz with reckless…um…abandon. As if his paternal failures aren’t dire enough, pictures indicate that all of his babies are even shawter than he is, not a-one of them taw enough ride a rollercoaster. What a drag. A lesser drag, however, than the Oxygen Network’s decision to indefinitely put All My Babies’ Mamas on the shelf, shamefully shoving shady Shawty’s show into shackles. How shitty.

For as much as the terrifying reality of Shawty Lo and his kin makes me feel EXACTLY like Wilford Brimley in The Thing, I was looking forward to the series. I figured it would be like Meerkat Manor, but more “street.” Regrettably, a petition or two suggested that Shawty’s real-life reality is somehow a contrived, racist parable, and that documenting his situation would cast an unfairly selective spotlight on African American fathers in general. The network initially countered, claiming the story of Shawty’s horde wasn’t “meant to be a stereotypical representation of everyday life for any one demographic or cross section of society…It is a look at one unique family….”

An alleged 40,000-plus signatures later, Oxygen was finally pressured into aborting the project. This abortion, I think, is a woefully unnecessary cop out on Oxygen’s part. Oxygen, or, for the love of God, SOMEBODY should man up and smash some stereotypes so this show can have a life, dammit! All it would take is the decent responsibility to find a White guy, a Jewish guy, and/or an Asian guy who also has eleven babies with ten mamas (give or take) and give them a reality show as well. Negative stereotypes and demographic targets would be shot (shawt!) down in one fell swoop of edifying, semen-bolstering reality entertainment. Until then, we must patiently try to content ourselves with Shawty’s YouTube presence and leave to our imagination the day when his babies fill they daddy’s shoes.

 

—LORIN

 


Comments
  1. raymi says:

    Reality tv is contributing to the ruination of civilization. We don’t need more Honey Booger families to idolize.

  2. I wonder how many people in that photo can read to a high school graduate level.

  3. Runswithfarts says:

    The people who petitioned this show are probably the types who claim to want to help minorities. But they did the opposite in the process by not allowing these breeders to make some much needed income that’s not subsidized by the government.

  4. Sniffy says:

    I wonder how many of them can read the instructions to their birth control. Sadly none of them can.

  5. tw says:

    If baby mamas second and third from the right of Shawty in the picture produce male off spring, they’ll have it made. SEC boosters will by greasing their palms by the time they’re preteens.

    If Shawty really wants to hit pay dirt, he needs to go out in the country and get him a big white woman. There’s a whole bunch of big ass half breeds running around down here in the hinterlands (most of ‘em really good kids). Only folks who’ll diddle big country girls are brothers and skinny red necks so, if he’s not afraid of stepping on the country brothers’ turf, he’s got a pretty good shot.

  6. Ryan says:

    “scapegrace and a crumb” is one of top five word combinations ever

  7. Lester says:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMPDaCPxqcU Two gangstaz watching fireworks at Disneyland

  8. Once those heads start to tiltin’, yo hedge shrubs be wiltin’!

  9. Ring Kodney says:

    They have a white guy with like 19 or whatever. Shit is on TLC, methinks. The problem is that a white dude with a zillion kids is UNCOMMMON, while Shawty Lo and his situation ARE common in the black community. Not maybe so many, but its not unusual for a clown here(Atlanta) to have 3-4 baby mammas and 4-5 kids. So….

  10. durka durka jihad says:

    Someone else mentioned the Duggars a while back to me. They’re nuts. But let’s remember that white guy is with one woman. Kooky as that family may be, the head of the house is not out dropping loads in a bunch of half-witted sheboons. The ‘outside keeeeeeeeeeeeids’ phenomenon is not exclusively black. But it’s like saying hairdressing is not exclusively gay.


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