Posted by
Street Carnage
• 11.08.17 10:00 pm

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Do men think we like digging through shit or do they enjoy disappointing women? I know that’s not why they’re so awful at interacting with us but it certainly feels that way sometimes. They all clearly put the effort in, despite how it may look to some and that is sweet but almost all of them miss the mark by a lot.

It’s obviously not easy for most and some of that is our own fault. Giving mixed messages or playing hard to get tends to throw a lot of the inexperienced ones off their game but there should be a point in time where it all clicks and they no longer need to use whatever stupid act they depend on.

I understand there are some of you out there who are perfectly fine with putting on a ridiculous ruse, as long as it means you’re getting laid. That’s part of the problem. Not every female wants to date the lead of a Hallmark Channel Christmas movie. Isn’t that embarrassing for you guys, anyways? Wouldn’t you rather go home with a woman because you’re you, not because you’re able to put on a stupid façade?

No one’s saying you have to be a completely unfiltered version of yourself. In fact, that’s probably the worst move you could make. Most of us hate how you guys act when you’re hanging out with your bros. Being able to act exactly like yourself all the time and still get laid isn’t a benefit you’re granted until after a few years of pampering us and marriage. Even that’s still kinda pushing it. We all know you guys are assholes compared to us and creepy as hell.

Every single one of us gets stared at like an All You Can Eat Naked Chicken Chalupa buffet, all the time. Even the ugly ones. Despite how flattering that may sound to you Jerkasauras-Rex’s, it’s not all that fun. We like that look but only behind closed doors, from the guys we want to have sex with. Getting it from any guy makes us hit the breaks and ruin any chance some underdog may have. So, it’s necessary to tone it back if you want to score. Toning it back to the point where we feel like the number one jock in highschool is too much.

Only the craziest of lesbians hate being looked at by you guys. Those are women who probably have a hard time getting it from their own. It’s so foreign to them that when someone actually shows interest, it’s uncomfortable. Those of us who enjoy real tube steak, like getting checked out from time to time. We just don’t want to feel like our picture is going to be in the newspaper the following morning. When a guy has to avert his eyes like we’re a burn victim, it’s almost worse.

I’m not going to lie, it’s kinda nice when a guy gets hit by a bus because he’s looking at your ass. When he’s staring at the street because he doesn’t know how to smile, it makes me want to jump in front of a bus. I’m not saying men should ogle women more but it would be nice if you guys learned to smile more.

-NICHOLE GUNTERSLY


Comments
  1. Orenthal J. Weinstein says:

    It’s some form of Elvish… I can’t read it…

  2. Name (required) says:

    It’s been years since I visited and commented here… nice to see the same crowd… feels… comfy


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