As you may have heard, Todd Barry was recently booed off the stage at a Tinkle reunion because David Cross and Jon Benjamin told the audience to do so.
Take it easy. It’s just the galleys.
As you may have heard, Todd Barry was recently booed off the stage at a Tinkle reunion because David Cross and Jon Benjamin told the audience to do so. They were fucking with Todd because he didn’t want to do the show and they figured he was also being a prima donna about the whole thing, so they sabotaged his surprise appearance. Todd (and a lot of other people judging by these comments) feels the joke went a little far and is not happy about it. This could end a friendship that goes back decades, so we’ve decided to let them hash it out here once and for all.
[Ed note: This conversation never happened. It’s what Gavin thinks they would say if they were to hash it out. The whole thing is made up in his gay head.]
DAVID CROSS: I can’t believe you put that comment on Brooklyn Vegan. Why did you have to take it there?
TODD BARRY: Why did I have to take it THERE? You’re the one who had garbage thrown at me.
Plastic cups? That’s garbage to you, fucking plastic cups? Where did you get the impression the venue handed out big piles of garbage to the fans? This isn’t Germany 400 years ago you know. There aren’t cabbages and rotten tomatoes ready to be flung at the performers.
And how exactly am I supposed to know that? I get on stage and everyone’s screaming BOO and I hear shit bouncing all over the place.
It was a joke.
All right, David, listen to me. Do you like being heckled?
No but this is hardly–
Hang on. You don’t like it, do you?
No I do not, Todd.
OK, well hatred for heckling is something that’s ingrained into our personalities as comics. To hear booing like that and –- all right -– plastic cups is like being heckled times a thousand. It’s very disturbing.
I cannot believe what a baby you are.
I can’t believe you can’t see why I would have a negative reaction to an attack like that.
IT WAS A FUCKING JOKE!!! You live in New York City and you can’t take a silly prank.
Oh, you must miss Old New York, huh Dave? Hanging at CBGBs with Richard Hell and buying junk off the Hell’s Angels.
Oh relax. I’m just saying your shitty attitude and fragile ego are not exactly the best ingredients for a good time in the big city. Like during the last blackout. Why did you have to make the whole thing so negative? Everyone I talk to said it was the best night of their lives. For you, it was just a huge inconvenience.
Why are you bringing that up? Are we in couples therapy now?
Why did you refuse to do the show? It was a reunion show and Eugene’s last night. You knew it was a big deal. And I get the Superchunk thing but you were right down the street.
Right down the street? I was seven miles away. That’s why I asked for a car. That’s why I asked the car to wait. I wasn’t being a prima donna. Maybe it’s because you don’t come to Brooklyn a lot but going from Music Hall of Williamsburg to the Bell House can be quite a trek. Half an hour if there’s traffic. Google it.
I can’t tell if you’re joking or not when you say things like “Google it.”
You know Eugene was pretty upset about it.
The only thing Eugene was upset about was the fact that you got all upset.
I didn’t bail on the Tinkle show.
I never said you bailed.
I just couldn’t do it. Superchunk was a paying gig and I’m not Mr. Squeekuel. I have bills to pay.
Yeah, yeah, I get that. I just think it would have been easier for you to just say yes and work it out. You didn’t get back to Jon and I for weeks and then you text Jennifer the night of? Why couldn’t you text me?
To be totally honest, I didn’t want to get into it with you and have to explain everything. Besides, I knew you guys would be fine without me.
That’s not the point. It’s not Tinkle without you. We called it Todd-less Tinkle for fuckssakes.
I know, I know. I appreciated that. I wish this whole thing didn’t blow up like that.
Well, it didn’t until you started commenting on the Internet.
Look, I regret that and I’m sorry, but I honestly think your prank went a little far. I’m not mad about it today but I’m allowed to be sketched out by a mob when my job is entertaining mobs, you know?
Yeah. I’m sorry too. I see what you’re saying.
No hard feelings?
None. You want to grab a beer?
I already have plans.
This piece of fan fiction was brought to you by…
UPDATE: Dear Street Carnage,
I was reading your article on the Todd Barry/David Cross incident and saw that you are using my photograph that I shot at The Bell House and posted on Brooklyn Vegan.
While I appreciate the humor in the article I do not appreciate you using my photograph without my permission. If you’d like to use the image with your post, I’d be happy
to discuss a licensing fee. Otherwise, please remove the photograph from your website.
Oh come on guy. Can’t we just link to your website?
Dear Street Carnage,
No. I never gave you permission to use the image.
Wow, you really know how to choose your battles.