Posted by
Gavin
• 01.19.11 11:44 am


Writing a hilarious quip is hard. You have to root around in your mind getting a bunch of bon mots together and then you have to assemble them in a concise sentence that resonates with thousands of people.

Writing a hilarious quip is hard. You have to root around in your mind getting a bunch of bon mots together and then you have to assemble them in a concise sentence that resonates with thousands of people. Twitter is like Scrabble for jokesters and comedy writers like The Sulk and NotKennyRogers are almost impossible to beat.

One of the more successful at this game is a brilliant jokester who calls himself Fat Jew. He’s basically the funniest guy on Twitter. Shit, he’s the funniest guy on the Internet. It’s like all his jokes represent the best Google has to offer. Oh wait, I just Googled some of his jokes. They’re the funniest thing on the Internet because they’re stolen from the Internet. Fat Jew is the Carlos Mencia of Twitter. What a tool.

1. Let’s start with his homepage:

Hmm, why does that remind me of the time I took the kids to see Megamind? Oh yeah….

2. But he gets a lot more shameless than that;
January 5, 2011:

October of 2008 from HotUkDeals:

3. December 31st, 2010:

This is an oldie but a goodie that has been all over the Internet for ages. Like how about here from a month before?

4. December 28th, 2010:

Another oldie but goodie available everywhere since forever including here:

5. December 27th, 2010:

August 15th, 2003:

6. No need to date this one….


7. Very original game, Fat Jew:

It’s only a website that goes back several years:

8. November 1, 2010, takes an old joke and puts “I laugh” in front:

From January 2010:

9. November 5th, Fat Jew blatantly rips off a Matt Besser joke from 2009:


10. Where to begin with this one? November 8th:

Since forever:

Shit, I just realized I forgot to check his Facebook. That’s got to have a whole other mountain of stolen jokes in it. Please list more in the comments.

UPDATE: Fat Jew just posted these two tweets an hour ago. Let’s see where they actually came from:

FAT JEW TWEET #1:

ORIGIN (ALMOST A YEAR AGO):

(Click to enlarge)

FAT JEW TWEET #2:

ORIGIN (ALMOST TWO YEARS AGO):

Shameless.

-GAVIN McINNES


Comments
  1. Joe says:

    Wow, what a hack. I had no idea. Fat Jew is just 4Chan with an afro.

  2. weiner says:

    he’s joke sampling

  3. kuntz mcgee says:

    1. is from V for Vendetta bro-cuz.

  4. Joe says:

    @Kuntz is right:
    “We are told to remember the idea, not the man, because a man can fail. He can be caught, he can be killed and forgotten, but 400 years later, an idea can still change the world.”

  5. Anonymous says:

    I still think he is funny.

  6. Jack Sesh says:

    doesn’t he write captions for dos and don’ts?

  7. blue waffle says:

    guy still sucks even if they were original.

  8. Bleep Bloop says:

    He did. And I remember them being unusually horrible. For a second I thought I was missing something.

  9. Christi Bradox says:

    Busted! For being not even that funny in the first place! If you’re gonna steal, steal better shit. I knew there was a reason I never liked him. I seriously DOUBT he writes the Dos and Don’ts because they are actually funny.

    Wow. Gavin just pretty much ruined this guy’s life.

  10. Christi Bradox says:

    Does this make Gavin even MORE like Joe Rogan?

  11. boioioioioiong says:

    this post is stupid.

  12. Christi Bradox says:

    This is his most recent tweet:

    FATJEW The Fat Jew
    Getting a fat girl naked and discovering she has small tits is like unwrapping a pack of Starburst and getting all yellows

    And a month or so ago (though I can’t find it!) @croninwhocares had a tweet about opening up a two pack of starburst and getting both yellows and that he might just go home.

    Bit of a stretch? Weird that I could trace the first tweet I saw though.

  13. Anonymous says:

    he even stole his name

    http://fatjewishguy.com/about

  14. Dave Steve says:

    I don’t care that the jokes are stolen- the Fat Jew compiling all the funniest ones into one place is a public service.

  15. Anonymous says:

    “And I just got a brand new humidifier MOTHERFUCKER” (Rapper who spends money reasonably)
    10:17 PM Jan 10th via ÜberTwitter

    from that canadian guy who makes sometimes funny songs and videos:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PsnxDQvQpw

    dude is not even trying

  16. Anonymous says:

    “Expose thine teats! Expose thine teats!” -Shakespeare on Spring Break
    8:21 PM Dec 4th, 2010 via ÜberTwitter

    that’s a meme from 2009:
    http://epic4chan.tumblr.com/post/173615939/expose-thine-teats-or-remove-thy-self

  17. Cable guy says:

    Epic thread is epic

  18. Yannis says:

    unchill

  19. Hank Himmler, Germantown, PA says:

    How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagon…..?

  20. Anonymous says:

    i couldn’t help but google his most current tweet. here is the same line said by someone else last year.

    http://vypur.wordpress.com/2010/04/09/any-time-i-take-a-girl-to-a-nice-restaurant-i-have-to-remind-her-dont-forget-to-save-room-for-the-blowjob/

  21. Yannis says:

    FU! anonymous you beat me by 1 second

    sad..

  22. Hunk Williams, Jr. says:

    He could at least steal funny jokes.

  23. Damien says:

    These posts are always strange because you get the feeling that fat jew said something mean about the auld G-Mac. The Gavster has literally made a career out of ripping people off. If it’s gay, he came up with it himself. If you laugh, it came frome elsewhere.

  24. Stan Jizzloader says:

    ummm, gavin? i know that i’ve been gone for a while, don’t worry i’m not taking my teva hiking sandals off, but whatever happened to your whole there is no intellectual property on the internet thing?

  25. Anonymous says:

    JOKE STEALERS ARE RUINING TWTTR!!!!

  26. Joe says:

    @Damien. Examples or it didn’t happen.

  27. Smelly says:

    I think I may have misunderstood my boss when she told me that she loved seeing me hard at work.

  28. C and the MS-13s says:

    I wish Darrell Bluett was touring.

  29. pogi says:

    Fat Jew doesnt make money out of his tweets so its ok. Its like he’s just compiling jokes. He is to twitter jokes as Gratis Recoup is to pics

  30. team jokelift says:

    At least he’s a really talented rapper /:(

  31. Leny the Younger says:

    I haven’t seen such an eruption of concern since at least the Sandal Scandal of ’71.

    0071, that is; A.D.

  32. poopsmear says:

    The king of brunch is still hilariou. Who writes the dos and donts now anyway? Is it nick gazen? Is this classified info?

  33. non-violent psychopath says:

    Why does my beard trimmer always smell like it’s been eating pussy?

  34. Norm says:

    @psycho

    Your roomate or you are using it to shave his/your asshole hair.

  35. hobot says:

    @pogi

    you´re right

  36. hobot says:

    I just want to know what Barf thinks about this controversy

  37. Semen Toffy says:

    ^^^
    Agreed.

  38. nooosleep says:

    His Chilean miners tweet was on tumblr with over 1000 reblogs before he tweeted it http://bit.ly/h53hTk

  39. non-violent psychopath says:

    @norm

    yeah, i know. it was my original one-liner that i offered to what was once a great comment section turned comedy morgue, numb nuts. it’s my ode to days gone by.

  40. Fat Jew's Mom says:

    Come on now, play nice boys.

    I’ll be back with rice krispie squares and tang.

  41. Eine Kleine Arsemusik says:

    Comedy is hard, jokes were stolen, Jews are fat, fucking Christ this was endless.

  42. Anonymous says:

    I liked the Chilean Miners when they were still underground, now they’re so mainstream

    That sounds familiar.

  43. Froot deLoins says:

    @psycopath:

    all the best lulzers vamoosed when they realized Gavin is just a wannabe Jim Goad. And Gonad rulz with an irony-free fist.

  44. Um says:

    Weren’t you the one who coined the expression, “care juice”?

    Get a life, man.

  45. YOUTHOFNAUSEA says:

    Gavin, you go girl. To the Fat Jew, I say, find a flap and fuck it.

  46. blaahus poopus says:

    controversial! a tweet-off is in order, i daresay…or back-to-back, then the most hilarious tweet fired at ten paces wins…or, well, whatever…

  47. Lame-O says:

    Come on. Give the guy a break. At least the fat Jewish comedian shtick is original. I’m sure he’s a really good person.

  48. stephen says:

    i generally don’t write lame whiny hateful shit on the internet (no offense most of you)… but when fat jew was writing dos and don’ts on vice for a week or two, i gave him a chance but got so insanely pissed at his shitty jokes that i talked shit daily until it was over

  49. charles says:

    Wow. Now, just like Carlos Mencia, he will have to give all the money back.

  50. FaceHeadAss says:

    To anybody who says that it’s ok to steal jokes if you don’t make money off of them: Shut the fuck up.

    People don’t make money FROM their Twitter feeds, but a lot of people make money indirectly BECAUSE of their twitter feeds. It’s a tool that many comedians use to create a running presence online. By stealing jokes off of someone’s feed and re-posting them, FATJEW is mis-representing himself as original and funny. I guarantee you that anyone who has paid him to do whatever he does has seen his twitter feed, and likely believed the jokes are his.

    And yes, FATJEW did write the do’s and don’ts for Vice for a month. They are not the funniest D&D’s I’ve read.

  51. FaceHeadAss says:

    Ps… there’s a lot of older jokes that many comedians take and make their own. Most people do those jokes onstage. And the performance/delivery/details always change from comedian to comedian. Copy/paste is not cool.

  52. Taeil says:

    Maybe I wasn’t funnier. But I now know I’m original. But seriously though, there’s not a lot of Jewish comedians out there and Gavin’s picking on him. He must be a Nazi or something.

  53. Fuckface says:

    So he’s actually just a Mexican? More like a Mexican’t!

  54. you all like "Fergie" says:

    Who could possibly have imagined on first encountering this dude that he wasn’t quite as talented as he led on?

    Wonders never cease.

  55. Taeil says:

    FAT JEW:
    For two words that mean the same thing, ‘woman’ and ‘lady’ sure do have vastly different consequences when added to the word ‘cat’
    1:15 PM Jan 10th via ÜberTwitter

    http://twitter.com/heyyyinternet :

    For two words that mean the same thing, ‘woman’ and ‘lady’ sure do exact vastly different consequences when appended to ‘cat.’
    8:52 AM Nov 20th, 2010 via Twitter for Android

  56. Taeil says:

    This reminds me of a tweet I did long ago.

    I told everyone I wrote the Communist Manifesto. When people called me out I simply replied, “Intellectual property is theft.”

  57. @ Joe says:

    Possibly because, as Jack Nicholson once said, “They can’t handle it.”

  58. Anonymous says:

    I hate Joe Rogan because he ruins the UFC… but in the video at the top I’ve got to say he’s impressive.

    Also is there anyone more awkward, less funny, less happy, less pleasant than a stand-up comedian?

  59. Do you hear yourself? says:

    “People don’t make money FROM their Twitter feeds, but a lot of people make money indirectly BECAUSE of their twitter feeds. It’s a tool that many comedians use to create a running presence online.”

    HA HA HA!

    Yes. Twitter is a professional tool for comedians, one which is used to generate income. Tweets aren’t these sort of sad one-liners for the lonely and deluded, they are the blood, sweat, and tears of uniquely talented individuals.

  60. Jojo "Cockmeat" Turner says:

    This cornball had a failed MTV show.

  61. temporo mandibular joint PAIN says:

    @ do you hear yourself?

    actually, celebs do get paid to tweet shit like how great whatever the energy drink is that they’re allegedly swilling while they tweet. you know like a kardahsian will tweet something like, “this red bull i’m drinking gives me the energy i need tame my red-hot bull’s wild pussy crusher. it is what it is!” and then 10k appears in their account. i read about it in bloomberg businessweek yesterday.

  62. Michael Moore Peeping Thru Ur Keyhole As U Type says:

    The problem w/ fat jews running the whole ecosystem is they require such endless amounts of goyim child-blood for their ritualistic black majik sacrifices that we’re gonna run out of kiddos!
    Moloch or Azazel or whoever they’ve been tithing the soul energy of baby Christians/Arabs better wean himself off it and start getting into that Rockstar Energy Cola shit…much better than you’d expect!

  63. Michael Moore Peeping Thru Ur Keyhole As U Type says:

    WHUYPZ there’s a “to” in there fellas. I”M GAY WITH JIZZ DRIPPING DOWN MY GULLET!!!

  64. Wooster The Cat says:

    Dos and Donts were awesome in the 90s.

  65. Wessyde Kingpin says:

    Gavin, you’re a despicable, closeted racist. Why don’t you go lick Ruppert Murdoch’s balls? Fuckin dumb hick. How jealous of Fat Jew are you? Granted he’s not that funny or even original, but what it worth compiling all of this just to prove a point? You’re an old hipster who goes on Carson Daly and talks about how it’s cool to do some shit with your socks blah, blah…it was only memorable cuz you played yourself on national television and you’re apparently mega tight with carson–the antithesis of cool..

  66. Anon says:

    This kid is more like Hacky Gleason.

  67. Where is Joe Rogan when you need him?! I just tweeted this article to Joe, maybe the Joke Stealing Avenger will take action on this Social Media Mencia!

  68. Retweet and favorite folks, so Joe hears our call! lol
    https://twitter.com/Blakeian/status/556214346276433920

  69. […] shill: The Fat Jew steals his content. This has been well documented — in the Washington Post, Street Carnage, Medium, and Playboy. Usually, he’ll snatch an image from somewhere on the web and repost it […]

  70. […] shill: The Fat Jew steals his content. This has been well documented — in the Washington Post, Street Carnage, Medium, and Playboy. Usually, he’ll snatch an image from somewhere on the web and repost it […]

  71. […] “FAT JEW STEALS JOKES [UPDATE: THE THEFT CONTINUES]” (From 2011) – Street Carnage […]

  72. […] In fact, people have been pointing out the flaws in his attribution system as far back as 2011 — when his presence was solely on Twitter and Fat Jew’s type of one-stop-joke-shop […]

  73. […] In fact, people have been pointing out the flaws in his attribution system as far back as 2011 — when his presence was solely on Twitter and Fat Jew’s type of one-stop-joke-shop […]

  74. […] In fact, people have been pointing out the flaws in his attribution system as far back as 2011 — when his presence was solely on Twitter and Fat Jew’s type of one-stop-joke-shop […]

  75. […] In fact, people have been pointing out the flaws in his attribution system as far back as 2011 — when his presence was solely on Twitter and Fat Jew’s type of one-stop-joke-shop […]

  76. #BlackTwitterLivesMatter says:

    Somewhere, Wessyde Kingpin is eating his words.

  77. […] In fact, people have been pointing out the flaws in his attribution system as far back as 2011 — when his presence was solely on Twitter and Fat Jew’s type of one-stop-joke-shop […]

  78. […] In fact, people have been pointing out the flaws in his attribution system as far back as 2011 — when his presence was solely on Twitter and Fat Jew’s type of one-stop-joke-shop […]

  79. […] FatJewish Steals Jokes Too […]

  80. Carlito says:

    This fat f@@k isn’t funny- He’s just Jewish so it’s alright


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